Eight unlikely characters I'd like to see in the new Avengers movie

Well, the Avengers movie is on its way. First, we will see a Thor and Captain America movie, but after that, all eyes are on the Avengers.

Now, we know this movie will feature what comic fans call "The Big Three" (Captain America, Iron Man, and Thor) as well as Samuel L. Jackson's Nick Fury. There is a fair chance that Hulk will be in it as well as Black Widow (played in Iron Man 2 by Scarlet Johansson). And there is a lot of speculation that the script will include Avengers mainstays Giant Man, Wasp, and Hawkeye.

Now, I'd like to see all of these in the Avengers movie and as long as we get most of them, I should be happy. But just for fun, I'd like to look at what characters I don't expect to appear in these movies, but would be pretty awesome. All of the picks are (or were) Avengers so there is sufficient justification to add them to this film. And with a superhero team movie such as this, it would be easy to add or remove characters from sequels, as we will assume they have their own personal heroing to get to.

So without further ado...

8) Vision

One Avengers character that has always intrigued me is Vision. He is the android of the team with the ability to alter his mass (thereby gaining super-strength or intangibility). Maybe its his name, his garish costume, his powers, or his relentlessly stoic demeanor, but I'd love to see him in a film. Just maybe not this one. He would be best in a future film with Ultron as the villain.

Like Data from ST:TNG, Vision is an outsider looking in on humanity with a mixture of envy, confusion, and disappointment.

7) Beast

Throughout the seventies, Hank McCoy left the X-Men and became an Avenger. With his acrobatic abilities, wise-cracking demeanor, and scientific brilliance, it was a really good fit. I'd love to see him introduced into the Avengers movies, but hopefully not played by Kelsey Grammer. I love Kelsey, but he was too dry for Hank. Once again, I'd cast Kevin Smith.

I doubt Beast will ever be in an Avengers movie. With Iron Man around, his skills are a bit redundant (unless the plot specifically requires a geneticist). The furry makeup would be a pain in the ass and probably wouldn't look good on screen (at least, it didn't on Kelsey). As one of my favorite characters, I really hope I'm wrong and he does appear.

6) Spider-Woman

Marvel has recently been giving Spider-Woman the star treatment. She is actually in no way related to Spider-Man. Even her origin is entirely different. She was genetically design with mixed spider genes as part of a super-soldier experiment by the team of terrorists known as AIM (Advanced Idea Mechanics). It would be interesting if the villain of the movie was a terrorist group like HYDRA or AIM, and if so, this could be the best way to introduce Jessica Drew to a wider audience.

5) Black Panther

The king of the mythical and technologically advanced nation of Wakanda would make a great addition to the team. I think of him as the African Batman... if Batman ruled his own technologically advanced country. Maybe he would be better served with a film of his own, but I'd love to see him in the Avengers. Wakanda actually had a cameo in the Wolverine film when they stole the sacred metal (vibranium) from the African tribe. Vibranium is one of the key compounds to create adamantium... which is what Captain America's shield is made out of.

4 & 3) Quicksilver & Scarlet Witch

These twins are the children of Magneto and that alone should mean that it is unlikely they would appear in Avengers. However, they never appeared in the X-Men films, so I have to wonder if their licensing rights are part of the "Avengers package" and not the X-Men one. Quicksilver's super-speed would be awesome on film while Scarlet Witch's hex bolts aren't so film friendly, but they can enable all sorts of interesting twists to the story.

2) Spider-Man

Well, with the Spider-Man franchise getting a reboot, this one seems extremely unlikely, but I'd kind of like seeing Toby Maguire's swan song in this film rather than Spider-Man 3. I imagine that the new teenage Spider-Man wouldn't fit well in the Avengers, but Toby's grown-up Spidey could really work.

If they don't think they'd want him in future films (for whatever reason), he could simply be a part of the crisis in this one and decline membership at the end. The same could be said for...

1) Wolverine

This choice surprised even me, but what wouldn't be awesome about having Hugh Jackman's Wolverine in the Avengers? With the X-Men receiving a similar teenage reboot, Wolverine will probably be absent (fingers crossed) or the Scott/Jean/Logan love triangle will be particularly uncomfortable. So what better answer than to move the character to the Avengers? Sure, I want him to leave the Avengers in the comic... but those are the comics.

Also, Wolverine is a great counterpoint to some of the other characters. You could start the movie with Wolverine being sent to track down the Hulk (much like in his original comic appearance). Captain America always teams up well with Wolverine because they have radically different experience being in the military... and Nick Fury would be somewhere in the middle. And just try to tell me that the chemistry between Robert Downey Jr. and Hugh Jackman wouldn't be awesome. If Wolverine saw a self-important rich boy in his own battlesuit, he would make it his goal in life to bug the crap out of him.

The more I think about it, the more I think that the only reason not to do it would be if they can't afford Hugh Jackman's salary.

Six things Wonder Woman needs to compete with Superman and Batman

Ahhh, Wonder Woman. I love to pick on you. There is just something about a character with an unwarranted degree of popularity... By this I mean that Wonder Woman is undoubtably a major superhero icon and the yard stick by which all superheroines are measured, but she really has never really taken off with a popular comic or movie or cartoon. The best she's had is the campy TV show that helped young boys realize they were gay.

But I firmly believe that there are no poor characters, only poor writers. The fact that Wonder Woman has survived and thrived this long without quality material just goes to show that there is something about this character that people gravitate toward. The trick is to keep them there. Usually they just leave disappointed...

So what does Wonder Woman need to receive the same cred as her closest counterparts? Below are six things that are essential to making Wonder Woman a success.

6) A better secret identity

No, I don't mean the fact that "Princess Diana" goes by the alias of Diana Prince, although it's a worse cover than Clark's glasses. What I mean is that the princess needs to get a life.

Why do we identify with Superman? Because he was raised by a loving family on a farm in Kansas. He's as American as apple pie... literally. Why do we identify with Batman? Because if we were rich and lost our only family as a young child, we may have ended up just like him.

But there is nothing to identify with about Diana. She was raised on an island of ancient Greek warrior women worshiping Greek gods and living in a Greek sapphic paradise! Not that there is anything specifically wrong about this aspect of her character; it is pretty much essential to her character, but it marks her as being culturally alien. While Superman may be literally alien, his values and upbringing are solidly American.

Furthermore, a secret identity is used to contrast the heroic identity of the protagonist thereby creating a depth of character. The god-like Superman is mild-mannered Clark Kent. The dark, brooding Batman is playboy, billionaire Bruce Wayne.

But Diana Prince (in the latest incarnation) is a secret agent... Why? What does secret agent contribute to the character? That's like Thor's alter ego being James Bond. My recommendation: make her a college professor. First of all, it establishes her as an intellectual and accomplished professional woman. Second, it is a job that pretty much no other superhero has. Third, it gets her involved with a wide variety of people. Fourth, it creates an environment where you can comment on your themes directly (i.e. class discussion).

What should she teach? Women's studies and mythology? Too obvious and limiting. How about psychology? She was created by a psychologist and many of her themes fall into the realm of psychology (i.e. gender and truth).

5) Her own city

What else do Superman and Batman have that Wonder Woman doesn't? Their own city.

While the Marvel universe keeps all of their heroes in one overcrowded city, DC tends to invent a fictional city for each of their heroes. The advantage to this is that they wear their city like a second pair of tights. Gotham City defines Batman. It is dirty, violent, and corrupt, but with a good heart deep down. She is a whore with a heart of gold. Metropolis, on the other hand, is the city of the future just as Superman is the man of tomorrow. It represents the best and brightest of America, much like he represents the best and brightest of Americans.

But Wonder Woman has never had her own city. For a brief time, she was located in Gateway City. Apparently created for Mr. Terrific and the Spectre in the golden age, this city was a stand-in for San Francisco and was never distinct enough to hold anyone's interest, so Diana continued bouncing around to places like New York and Washington DC, but she never really had a home except for Themyscira. Consequently, when she "goes home," it isn't like Superman going back to Kansas or to the Fortress of Solitude. It's more like weekend trips back to Krypton; that is, completely unrelatable.

Personally, I would put Diana in Opal City. First of all, it has a beautiful art deco cityscape with Parisian influences in the architectural design. Second, it is a bit mystic and odd, much like Diana herself. It is a city that just sort of popped up in the middle of nowhere and it has no suburbs. Third, a lot of fans love it and since Jack Knight left it at the end of Starman, it's up for grabs. I say Diana should put down some roots there.

(Note: Pictures are of Opal City.)

4) A stable supporting cast

Along with Diana not having a city or a real alter ego is the fact that she doesn't really have a supporting cast. Except for her Amazonian mother and sisters, no one has been a constant presence in Diana's life. In the original comics, she had her romantic interest, Steve Trevor, and her chubby best friend with the appropriately inappropriate name of Etta Candy, but these were mere ciphers who only really made sense when Diana's alter ego was a military secretary... which only made sense during World War II. She has had a few main supporting characters since, but no one really stuck around. And it isn't surprising since nothing about Diana has remained consistent.

Superman has Lois Lane, Perry White, Jimmy Olsen, and Ma Kent not to mention interesting minor characters like Bippo (his biggest fan), Cat Grant, and Steve Lombard. Batman has Alfred, Commissioner Gordon, Robins 1-5, Oracle/Batgirl, Lucius Fox, and even kindly Dr. Leslie Thompkins.

No woman is an island, Diana. You need to get out more. Find a city to call home, make a life for you there, and surround yourself with interesting people. That's all any of us wants and we live vicariously through these comic book adventures.

3) Better villains

Who is Batman's arch-nemesis? What about Superman? Now what about Wonder Woman?

If you answered Cheetah or Circe, you are not only a geek, you are wrong. Superman and Batman have chemistry with their antagonists. They are perfectly incompatible figures. Where Superman is selfless, Lex is self-obsessed. Where Batman is relentlessly serious, Joker doesn't take anything seriously. In seeing these heroes battle their ideological counterpoint, the themes of their stories take on shape and develop a symbolism all their own.

Perhaps the one Wonder Woman villain who almost fits this definition is Ares. He is the god of war to Diana's princess of peace, but really, Ares isn't all that interesting and he certainly isn't original. Any fight between them will be little more than the usual examples of pure good versus pure evil.

There is no easy answer here. Old villains should be retooled and new ones should be introduced, but a good superhero comic depends on good villains. It's no surprise that the best comics have the best villains (Batman, Spider-Man, X-Men).

2) A personality

Oh sweet god in heaven, Wonder Woman needs a personality! I mean, Superman is bad, but Wonder Woman is worse. Superman is a boy scout, but Wonder Woman is bipolar. Her two states are maternal nurturer and hardened warrior. She will hold you while you cry, then snap your neck if you turn evil.

Seriously, does any one really believe this character? When a writer starts to write Wonder Woman, do they just think "warrior" and "woman" then start typing? Who is she? I don't even know. What TV shows does she like, or does she watch TV? Does she read? If so, what? What are her stances on feminist issues like abortion, pornography, and prostitution? Does she like Hillary Clinton or hate her?

Speaking of feminism, what type of feminist is she? Paglia or Steinem? If I use the word "bitch" around her, will she get mad? Does she get upset over objectification of women? In that outfit, I would think it somewhat hypocritical.

Even if every writer has their own interpretation of the character, there still should be enough consistency so that when the next writer comes in, they aren't just thinking "warrior woman" and starting from scratch.

1) One great comic

Ultimately, what Wonder Woman really needs but has never had is one great comic. If you want to make any superhero succeed, you need to have at least one definitive comic that I can hand to someone and say, "This is who [blank] is!" It needs to require absolutely no previous knowledge, illustrate the characters defining principles, and leave the reader eager for more.

The best comics featuring Wonder Woman are not Wonder Woman comics. Mostly, they are Justice League comics like JLA, Kingdom Come, or New Frontier. While these certainly help, Wonder Woman needs to learn to stand on her own if she is ever going to be in the same league with DC's leading men. While Wonder Woman may have a handful of good stories (maybe even really good stories), she has nothing that comes close to modern classics like Batman: Year One, All-Star Superman, The Dark Knight Returns, or Superman: Birthright.

Second generation superheroes

There are two things that superheroes rarely do that real people do all the time: get married and have children. The reason they don't do it is because marriage ties the hero down and children tend to point out the unnatural relation superhero comics have with the passage of time. Consequently, superhero children tend to come from the future, bizarre experiments, or a hidden past.

Included below are just some of the most notable second generation superheroes/

Jon Kent (Superman/Lois Lane)

Featured in The Son of Superman by Howard Chaykin, this tells the story of Lois Lane as a single mother after Superman disappeared and the boy's realization that he is the son of the world's greatest hero. However, growing up in a more complex world dealing with terrorism on one side and fascism on the other, Jon begins to question if his father is really the hero the world needs.

Damian Wayne (Batman/Talia Al Ghul)

Like the Emperor in Star Wars, Ra's Al Ghul wants his enemy to inherit his empire and in Son of the Demon, Bruce Wayne did just that. Taking over the League of Shadows, Batman briefly ran an international terrorist organization and actually did a lot of good. The evenings he spent with Ra's Al Ghul's daughter, Talia, and the story ends with Talia revealing her baby. Only recently, with the Batman and Son storyarc have we gotten to see the product of Bruce's loins... and he is a deadly little brat.

In recent comics, Bruce Wayne is dead and Damian has become Robin to Dick Grayson's Batman.

Huntress (Batman/Catwoman)

The original progeny of Batman, Helena Wayne was also the daughter of Catwoman. She came from the alternate universe of Earth-2 based on the golden age of DC Comics. Although her universe was destroyed and parentage was retconed, she continues to be a popular character and ally of the Bat family.

Black Canary II (Black Canary I)

One of the most notable second generation superheroes is Black Canary who recently married Green Arrow. Her mother was the golden age Black Canary who fought villains back during World War II. Try not to think about the timeline too much and it almost makes sense. She was perhaps the first legacy hero to appear regularly in new comics.

Daken (Wolverine)

Another long lost son, Daken (whose name means "bastard dog" or "mongrel") was born to a Japanese woman who Logan thought dead. Years later, Daken was made into a weapon, not unlike his father. In addition to his father's powers, he has powerful pheromones which suppress his scent and alter the emotions of others. He recently killed Punisher and has his middle claw popping out of the bottom of his arm instead of the top.

Why? I'm not sure. Doesn't seem very effective.

As a sidenote, Daken is supposedly bisexual. Is it homophobic for me to find that frightening? Maybe it's just that seeing the blood lust he has for eviscerating people, it's not that unlikely to imagine him as a serial rapist as well.

If I was Spider-Man, I would be paying a lot of attention to my spidey sense when he is around.

X-23 (Wolverine [clone])

Wolverine also has a recent daughter, though as I understand it, X-23 is actually a clone that duplicated his X-gene to create a more stable female model. Like her dad and brother, she was created and trained as a weapon. Her own variation on her father's claws: two claws each on her hands and one on each of her feet.

Biggest downside? Like her brother, she has a crappy codename.

Phoenix II/Marvel Girl (Cyclops/Phoenix)

I always thought it was interesting that the two most uptight and conventional X-Men produced a punk like Rachel Summers. I guess it makes sense since she was raised in the post-Apocalyptic Days of Future Past and (once again) turned into a weapon by her enemies. She gained a new lease on life when she traveled back in time to fight alongside the X-Men and Excalibur.

She recently returned from the future again, this time with the name and costume of Marvel Girl... since no one was using it anyway.

Cable (Cyclops/Madelyne Pryor)

What happens when you have a baby with the evil clone of your one true love? You get a 'roided-up Leifeld gunslinger with a Dirty Harry attitude just made for the '80s and with unwarranted popularity in the '90s. Cable wasn't created as the son of Scott and Madelyne, but somehow it happened...

... now it cannot unhappen... although I'd overlook the retcon if it did. Promise.

Stryfe (clone of Cable)

What happens when you clone the baby of the evil clone of your true love? You end up with an evil clone who sports the most awkward costume I have ever seen.

Makes me wish there was some place you could banish comic ideas to where they would never return from. I think its a magical land called "litigation" and it never happens to characters who deserve it... because no one wants them enough.

Nate Grey (cloned son of Cyclops and Jean Grey from an alternate universe)

What happens when... You know what? Fuck it. Alternate reality teenage Cable. NEXT!

Ruby Summers (Cyclops/Emma Frost)

Ruby is a recent creation by X-Factor scribe Peter David. Although it may add more wrinkles to the continuity of the Days of Future Past storyline, Ruby was shown as her father's soldier in a rebellion against genetic oppression. Her body is ruby quartz in a manner similar to Emma Frost's diamond form, but she also possesses her father's trademark optic blasts.

Wiccan & Speed (Scarlet Witch/Vision)

Now here is one of the weirdest ones. Scarlet Witch is the daughter of X-Men villain Magneto. Her power is to alter probability with "hex bolts." While this originally meant she could alter the fortune of small objects in her favor (i.e. causing an enemy to trip, the roulette ball to land on black, or cause a mounted TV to fall on someone's head), in recent comics, it was revealed that this has quantum implications meaning that basically, she can do anything.

Well, a long time ago, Wanda fell in love with the robot Vision and inadvertently created in him the ability to reciprocate those feelings. At one point, her powers actually enabled her to have twin boys with the man-bot, but when someone pointed out that she made them up out of pure crazy, they ceased to exist.

They later returned for no apparent reason having been adopted and lived pretty much normal lives and possessing powers of their own. The most notable of these children is Billy "Wiccan" Kaplan, most notable for being one of the few homosexual male superheroes. The other is Tommy Shepherd, a less developed character based on Quicksilver who goes by the name "Speed" which is a terrible name, movie, and drug.

Bad choice, kid, but considering your upbringing, you got off light.

Franklin Richards (Mr. Fantastic/Invisible Woman)

The first born of the Fantastic Four, Franklin possesses the latent psychic abilities of GOD apparently. He makes AKIRA look like Rasputin. After the FF and the Avengers were killed fighting Onslaught, he created a pocket universe inside his little blue ball and recreated them with his imagination. While he is currently just a kid, those god-like powers can crop up at any moment.

Incidentally, he is destined to meet and fall in love with Rachel Summers in Days of Future Past.

Valeria Richards (Mr. Fantastic/Invisible Woman)

Their second born is arguably creepier. Barely more than an infant, she is already smarter than her father making her possibly the smartest human being on Earth. Imagine if your child invented a time machine while munching Fruit Loops and watching Spongebob. That's Valeria.

Spider-Girl (Spider-Man/Mary Jane)

An alternate future, female version of Spider-Man, May "May Day" Parker ended up inheriting her father's powers and legacy as Spider-Girl. Somehow, she managed to have a long running series that avoided death more inexplicably than Kenny. The character was uninspired and every other character in the story was a slightly less interesting twist on one or more pre-existing Marvel character.

Starman III (Son of Ted Knight, the original Starman)

Jack Knight is the son of the original, golden age Starman. He wasn't supposed to carry the mantel, but after his brother was shot by a sniper, Jack had to rise to the occasion to save his father and his family. Jack is the only second generation hero here to surpass his lineage. The Starman series was massively popular and is still considered one of the best examples of the genre. If it weren't for Jack Knight, the name "Starman" would just be another hokey superhero long forgotten.

Damsels in distress

Hot on the heels of the announcement that the Spider-Man film franchise would feature a teenage reboot akin to X-Men, I read an article filled with reactions from comic book professionals. One response was from seasoned artist Gerry Conway who said:

"I also was never fond of Kirsten Dunst as Mary Jane. Again, a terrific actor, but she didn't strike me as the right casting for MJ -- MJ, in my view, is a woman who's cursed by the expectations others have for her based on her appearance. She should appear to be a vaguely slutty babe, and whatever one might say about Dunst, wonderful actress that she may be, a babe she's not.... [S]he should present as a Bad Girl, as misunderstood and underestimated by the world as Peter is. Recasting these actors can only improve the impact of the franchise."

It made me start to think about the role of the romantic interest in the realm of action/adventure. What does it take to be the leading lady to a leading man? When you are the non-powered, ever present damsel-in-distress, what qualities do you need to compliment your stalwart hero?

Lois Lane

Indisputably the most iconic damsel-in-distress in comics, Lois may in fact be the most recognizable D.I.D. in the world. On one level, Lois is the ultimate gold digger. Often in the comics she either dates or has dated Lex Luthor, indicating her preference for powerful men. The irony in her character is that she is chasing the world's most powerful and inaccessible man while ignoring the shy, honest, and intelligent Clark Kent sitting at the desk next to her.

What works about this relationship is that Lois Lane may shoot for the most powerful man on Earth, but she is tough enough to deal with him. Lois is someone who thrives by adversity. She is a hard-nosed journalist who believes in truth, justice, and the American way.

Lana Lang

Superman's childhood love interest was usually used as a foil against Lois, but in the overall Superman mythos, she represents Clark's youth in Smallville. She is his first love and there will never be another like her, but ultimately, Clark has to grow up and leave behind the simple life he had probably imagined before gaining his powers.

Mary Jane Watson

As Mr. Conway pointed out, there was always something a bit slutty about MJ. This is not meant to disparage her. There is nothing wrong with being slutty, but she showed up at Peter Parker's door with the words, "Face it, Tiger, you just hit the jackpot!" She is a model and actress who has always wanted to be a model and actress. Essentially, she is someone who is really extroverted and an exhibitionist... as compared to Peter who is quite, humble, and often happy to go relatively unnoticed.

This dichotomy is not something addressed much in the Spider-Man mythos. Mainly, they focus on the usual problem with superheroes being late for dates thereby making their girlfriend mad. But seeing as Peter Parker is quite definitely a science geek while MJ is a drama queen, there is a lot of tension to be exploited in this relationship.

Gwen Stacy

Adding another layer of complexity to their relationship is Peter's relationship with Gwen Stacy. Although I'm not old enough to have read much about her before she died, the significance of Gwen Stacy has echoed long after her death... largely because of it. Even in the issue where Peter marries Mary Jane, he spends his last night as a bachelor thinking Gwen Stacy was the real love of his life that he lost. Seeing as fans and writers alike seem to have mixed feelings about his relationship with Mary Jane, maybe Spider-Man is just not a character who should have a single love.

Again, although I didn't read the original comics, subsequent comics have portrayed Gwen as a bright light in Peter's often miserable life. Consequently, Peter looks back at this relationship and has to wonder if he missed the one girl for him.

Carol Ferris

Hal "Green Lantern" Jordan's lady love was actually his boss. A strange situation to be in, Carol was constantly stringing Hal along while chasing Green Lantern, echoing Lois Lane's relationship with Superman.

The dynamic is an interesting one. In many ways, Hal is more of an old-fashioned guy than the other superheroes. He is a soldier and a test pilot practically oozing machismo, so it's interesting that the woman of his dreams was a young woman who ran a major aeronautics company. It isn't really surprising that Hal had trouble trying to get her to settle down and commit to him.

Iris West

The Flash's lady love was one of the few who didn't have her eye on a certain spandex clad local hero, despite her being a reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper. Her only really purpose in the story was to ironically call Barry Allen the slowest man on Earth because he could never keep appointments while saving humanity as the Flash.

Steve Trevor

Our only male entry in "damsels-in-distress," Steve Trevor definitely qualifies. This career military officer had his eyes on Wonder Woman from the beginning, but overlooked the dowdy, bespectacled Diana Prince.

Like Hal Jordan, he reversed gender expectations by chasing after the unachievable woman. Through her rejection of Steve, Diana was demonstrating that she did not want to be subordinate to a man... although she would be subordinate to a woman and had occasional thoughts of having Steve subordinate to her.

Princess Leia

Possibly the best damsel-in-distress ever! She is the whole motivation of the first and best Star Wars film perfectly demonstrating the trope of the princess captured by a dark and evil king in an inaccessible fortress. She lies to her captors, insults her rescuers, then steals a blaster and starts taking command. She also likes to kiss her brother and bang scruffy looking men.

Angelina Jolie will be playing her in the remake.

Alexandra DeWitt

Kyle Rayner's girlfriend was created to give him a sense of revenge and is used as short hand for misogyny demonstrated through harming female characters to motivate male characters to avenge them. Personally, I think it's kind of a silly thing to get upset about.

Most Modern Playboy Award

And the award for pop culture icon least needing a significant other to define him goes to... Batman! Here is a man who has never been awkwardly paired with any woman consistently throughout his many incarnations. The first comics featured his girlfriend, Julie Madison; the first movie co-starred Kim Basinger as Vicki Vale; Talia had his baby; and Catwoman married him in an alternate universe, but no one can really tie him down.

Although I may be forgetting someone...

Poetry

Separated.

Words fail me.

My voice seems a weak, discordant thing.

Mangled, quiet, confused.

Echoing in my head repetitively.

Betrayed by words

Frightful things

Can kill you

But never in your power

A source of deception

Self-deception

Delusion

To own a thing by naming it

To capture its essence in a sound

Reduced the sound to abstract symbols

And train your mind to think the word was greater than the reality.

----

Alone.

I live a life with a cardboard cut out.

A place holder.

An imaginary friend

Who I forget is there.

I lie in bed at night with pillow on either side of me

Large pillows that feel like another body next to me

Which ever side I want to sleep on

I have a pillow to hold.

I can't sleep without the sound of a running ceiling fan.

It drowns out all other sound

Like a heart beat or another breath.

I never cook

But I love to cook.

I love to experiment with cooking.

But when you don't have much money

And only yourself to feed

There is no need to impress anyone

And I don't feel the same sense of satisfaction

From delighting my own taste buds.

I take a lot of pleasure from the emotions of others.

I live vicariously through them.

I love to watch TV shows or movies with friends.

Their laughter makes things funnier

Or maybe I'm just laughing at how hard they are laughing.

Women get more emotionally involved with films.

It is fun when they become emotionally attached to entirely fictional events.

I'm a little too detached, I think.

Without company, television and movies aren't much fun.

The conversations I miss most of all.

Our conversations seemed to go on forever.

Or is my memory wrong?

Were there many uncomfortable silences

Or periods when we were just plain boring?

I don't remember it that way.

I remember long-winding conversations spiraling to and from every point

From irrelevant pop culture to social observations to spiritual philosophy

Nothing left unexplored

And no end in sight.

The mornings are always disappointing.

I never remember a dream

But wake with my mind racing

On trivial things

The same things I think of when I'm awake.

Morning wood tempting me

I sometimes resist.

But usually I lie deep under the covers

My sore eyes struggle to focus on the alarm clock

I wake up way too early.

I always wake up way too early.
Waking, like sleeping, is a waiting game.

Staring at the clock for hours

Negotiating the minutes in my mind

But I always wait as long as possible

Gathering the blankets close around me to protect me from the morning air

Finally, I crawl out of bed frozen and with a haze in my brain.

I stumble into the bathroom

My eyes adjust to harsh white light.

I try to focus on the tub

And spot the daily trail of ants seeking water.

I try to drown as many as possible with the shower head.

It's an ugly way to start the day.

And I spend the time thawing

Trying to prepare for a new day

And knowing that when it is over

I have this to look forward to the following morning.

Showers are a much better thing to share.

A cramped, awkward, and dangerous shower shared

Is far better than a spacious one alone.

Someone to wash your back for you

And tweak your nipple when you aren't expecting it.

Warm, wet bodies.

Nothing quite like the sensation of a warm, wet, naked hug.

And is it my imagination

Or are people more beautiful in the shower?

----

Vanilla girl

She's a good girl.

I love her deeply.

The sweetest laugh.

Adoring eyes.

The brightest smile.

She thinks the world of me.

And attributes to me wisdom

That I doubt I have.

She holds me with affection

And fears I'll one day leave.

I hold her closer.

Protecting her like porcelain.

But all I want

What I really need

Is for her to hold me down.

I don't need much.

I don't want much.

A word.

A whisper.

Not a slap

But a tug on the leash.

A subtle reminder

That she holds me

Owns me.

Not because I let her

But because my heart does.

Only then can I be free.

That she would but think to claim me.

That she would choose to have me.

If she could only know

The power she possesses over me

If only she would claim it.

I long for the strength of surrender.

The feeling of purpose and dedication.

With the love that such a close bond must engender.

But I can only love you as a father does

Protecting but never nurturing.

Always guiding, but never guided.

Always responsible.

Always carrying the burden.

----

Floundering

What a wonderfully descriptive word

Like a fish lying on the dock

Desperate to return to the water

But not possessing a single muscle capable of navigating the alien landscape.

By chance alone

His floundering might enable him to reach the water

But when chance and strength fail

The fish stops struggling

Only a few flips and flops

More instinct than ambition

Until it is just trying to breathe

Eyes open

Always.

Fantasy Comics

When I was a kid, I loved sword and sorcery tales... or "fantasy" as it was referred to in an overly simplistic way. (Really, aren't they all fantasies?) Maybe it was growing up in the country with acres to tromp across and sticks to act as swords, or maybe it was the hero's journey and exploring the world.

In any case, I would rarely write any similar stories, but mostly worked in science fiction or superheroes. But there are a couple ideas I've had bouncing around in the back of my head for a while...

The first is the story of a child hero who used to travel to a magical world of war and wonder (i.e. Harry Potter, Alice, or the Narnia kids). However, after puberty hit, he found that he could no longer return to that world and was stuck in his normal boring life where nothing he did really mattered. He tried to convince people of his childhood adventures, but all that came of that was being put on medication. So now our hero is in his late teens/early twenties and plagued by depression when the barrier between worlds starts to come down and evil creatures from the other side invade his world.

I'm not sure how I want to tell this story. I was thinking about having a different protagonist. Possibly a young girl who finds the young man and he acts as her guide. So his sub-plot would be about trying to reconcile who he was with who he is.

I was also thinking about how this world crosses over with ours. I was watching a special feature for The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus when Terry Gilliam said something that interested me about how the villain of the piece corrupts the beauty of the fantasy world... and in the sketches, you can see a great staircase leading down to a beautiful river where a beautiful girl in a gondola is slowly floating down to an area in the river filled with scum, a tire, a shopping cart, and assorted other junk.

It occurred to me that the story could be about a battle between the fantasy world of childhood and the corrupt pragmatism of the "real world." Sort of "what it could be" versus "what it is." In that sense, it would fit the theme of the male lead personally and the story becomes something of an attempt to recapture the imagination he lost... possibly through the girl, if she is the protagonist.

The other idea I have falls along similar lines, but not so similar that I could combine the two. I've often questioned why the creatures of the fantasy genre are confined to medieval history and wondered what would happen if you followed such a world through the Renaissance, the Age of Exploration, the Wild West, and straight into present day. I imagined elves confined to reservations and "integrated" elves forming gangs in inner cities or just becoming bums. Then you would have dwarves, trolls, ogres, etc. When teenage girls get into magic, they really can fuck things up. There is a black market for things like unicorn horns or dragon's scales.

The protagonist of this story would be a cop, but in this world, the cops are like paladins. They look pretty much like a normal cop, but they know magic and carry enchanted items. Their badges have been enchanted with powers of protection, so when they refer to it as their "shield" it has a double-meaning.

Like the other one, I'm not sure where this would go, but I'd like to keep it in the crime genre with tongue-in-cheek fantasy references. The villain I imagine would be a sorcerer either collecting ingredients or carrying out a hit list. Maybe there would be an FBI investigator stepping on our hero's toes.

Anyway, I think these would both work well as comics and I'm surprised there aren't more fantasy comics. The genre lends itself to the medium very well with visually distinct creatures, heavy doses of action, and the ability to include lengthy exposition or character development.

Food for thought.

Life

Just something I found at imgur.com